Tangled (Adam Ruzek)

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Kissing Adam had ways of short circuiting her brain, making her forget that there were things that they needed to talk about before she let her heart get wrapped up in this again. Yeah right, she mentally scoffed at herself, it was too late for that.  Honestly her heart had been wrapped up so tight in Adam from the first time they’d kissed that she had yet to manage to
untangle it.  But still, talking was good…they needed to be talking not kissing.  Even as she was telling herself this she was pulling him closer.

Finally gaining a bit of her composure she pulled back from the kiss taking a few shaky breaths before leaning back looking up at him.  She’s confused, she’s wanted this for so long but there’s so much that still needs to be said. “Adam…” she starts, before leaning in to kiss him again…yeah, the kissing was nice. Pulling back again and shaking her head, “As nice as this is,” she says gesturing between the two of them grinning, “And trust me...I’m enjoying it…it’s nice, but we really need to
talk…about things…before we spend too much time doing this,” She says kissing him again. “Because kissing you makes it really hard for me to think about anything…other than kissing you.”

Chastising herself for sounding like a lovesick teenager she finally pulls back placing her hand on his chest looking back up at him again.  “So, uh…we…everyone just finished up for the day and they are planning on heading to Molly’s…I’m sure they’d all be almost as happy to see you as I am, I know everyone has missed you.  I’d really like it if you’d come for a while,
and then if you’re feeling up to it…we, well I can talk later, and you can listen.”  It gave her an excuse to be close to him and she reasoned that she might need a bit of liquid courage to help her say what she needed to say…She had long since come to the conclusion that their failed relationship was entirely her fault, and for better or worse she really did owe him an apology for putting him through everything that she had.

Tag: @adamruzek

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Kissing Kim was like Heaven. He had no idea how he had gotten so lucky, but he knew that he had. Wow, he thought to himself. He was only half-listening as she said that they needed to talk as nice as the kissing was because kissing him made it hard for her to think.
"What is it?" he asked in concern. Sounds serious, he thought to himself. Was she about to say that they had to put a stop to things for good? He hoped not. He loved her and wanted to make things work. He didn't want a second failed relationship.

When she suggested that they go to Molly's as people had been missing him, saying that they could talk later.
"Sure, that sounds good," he agreed. That didn't sound like she wanted to break things off. Well, he was hoping anyway. But yeah. As long as he could spend time with her, he'd do almost anything she wanted.

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When Adam asked "What is it?" She pulled away slightly, shook her head, and wrapped her arms around herself. "Not here, and not now... but later I promise." She said as she stood on her tip toes to kiss him again. She wasn't sure what she had done to earn this second chance, but she sure wasn't going to mess it up again by making the same mistakes twice. She loved Adam, she had always loved him... even when she had stupidly handed his ring back to him that day, she had never truly stopped loving him.

When he agreed to go to Molly's she smiled up and him and grabbed his hand, "So are you driving or am I?" She asked hoping that he'd agree to go together. Now that he was back she didn't want to spend any more time away from him than she absolutely had to ever again.

@adamruzek

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Adam nodded as Kim replied that while they wouldn't talk right then, they'd talk later. Okay, so she's not rushing to say anything, which means she still wants to be together, he thought to himself. Either that or she wanted to break up with him in private. No! He wasn't going to borrow trouble. He didn't know what she wanted, but he knew that he couldn't be bothering trouble.

When she asked who was driving, he grinned.
"I can if you want," he offered. He didn't mind driving. He liked it. But at the same time, he didn't want her thinking he was trying to control her by not allowing her a way to leave if she wanted to. Okay, he had to stop thinking like that. Everything was going to be okay. He just had to believe that.

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When Kim saw Adam nod she smiled, but when he didn't have a comment it was like she could see the wheels turning in his head. She kissed him again for a moment, "Relax Adam, it's nothing bad. I just owe you a few apologies and explanations and I need to do it sooner rather than later, because I want this," she gestured between the two of them, "more than anything in the world, but I want to do it right this time." She quickly became unsure as to whether or not she should have said anything, because what if she'd read him wrong and he wasn't interested in giving her another shot she'd just made a fool of herself. Unsure of herself she nibbled on her bottom lip for a moment before adding, "Uhm, I mean... that's only if that's what you want, of course."

When he agreed to drive Kim smiled at him happily, "Lead the way, I'm still not a big fan of driving." Thinking about it for a moment she warned him, "You know if we show up together there may be questions and assumptions... I don't mind at all, but just wanted to make sure you were ok with that." Heck she'd be happy to let every woman in Chicago assume she was with Adam if it kept them away from him, and as for the guys she wasn't interested in any of them anyway.

She walked next to Adam on the way to his car blowing on her hands to keep them warm, "So where are you staying? I went by your place when you left and everything had been boxed up and moved... made me sad. I loved that place... lots of memories there, good memories."

@adamruzek

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Adam nodded as Kim told him to relax because it was nothing bad, saying that she owed him a few apologies as well some explanations and that she'd rather do it sooner or later as she wanted there to be a them more than anything. Okay, so she didn't quite use those words, but he understood what she was trying to say.
"I want that too," he stated, smiling at her reassuringly as she quickly added that it was only if he wanted it. More than you know, he thought to himself. Way more than she knew. But she wold most likely be finding out before the night was through. Well...if things went the way he hoped they would.

When she told him to lead the way cause she still wasn't a big fan of driving, he headed over to his car, unlocked it, went to the passenger's side, and opened the door for her. As he got into the driver's seat, he smiled a bit as she reminded him that if they showed up together there would be questions and assumptions, saying she didn't mind it but wanted to make sure he was okay with it.
"Let 'em ask and wonder. It's none of their business," he answered.

his eyes flickered as she asked him when he had moved out of the apartment, saying that she had stopped by and had found out that he had moved, saying that she had loved the place and his moving had made her sad because there had been a lot of good memories there.
"Well I was renting that place and I finally found a house that I could buy. It has a big yard, and uh...I was able to get a dog. A Golden Retriever named Shadow," he responded.

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She smiled up at him when he opened her door for her and thanked him. She nodded when he said it was none of their business. “When has something not being any of their business ever stopped our friends from being nosey and getting involved?” She laughed and impulsively reached over and grabbed his hand. “I’ve missed this… missed us… missed you.” She sniffed and felt a tear fall. She silently fussed at herself as she went to wipe the tear away. ‘Great Kim, start with the waterworks already… if you hadn’t scared him before he’ll surely run now.’

When Adam spoke of buying a house she could tell how happy and proud he was, which made her want to cry even more because once upon a time there had been talk of them finding someplace together and she’d messed that up to. “That’s great Adam, I know you always wanted a house… I’m happy for you. Wait…. What? A dog?” She looked up at him and smiled. “A golden retriever? They’re my favorite. Well I hope I get to meet Shadow soon.” She said turning to look out the window.

These were all things that they’d discussed doing together; the house, the backyard, the dog, and she had single handedly screwed it all up. Adam had continued to move on with his life, and had apparently accomplished so much more than she knew. Meanwhile she was still in the same crappy apartment stuck in the same funk she’d been in since she’d stupidly given him his ring back. Now she’d missed out on so much that she could never get back. She nibbled on her bottom lip as she looked out the passenger window reflecting on everything.

Taking a deep breath she attempted to change the subject, “Everyone’s going to be so happy to see you back. Al just hasn’t been the same without you, I was a poor substitute and I don’t think he likes me all that well. I know Kev’s missed you because that’s about all I’ve heard about since you’ve been gone. He’ll be happy to have his buddy back, apparently hanging out with me wasn’t quite the same.”

@adamruzek

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Adam chuckled as she asked him when the others had let the fact that something was none of their business discourage them from sticking their nose into their affairs.
"Fair enough," he said. Yeah, it was something that annoyed him to no end, but he knew that they did it out of love. Well, mostly. He then smiled as she stated that she had missed the two of them being an "us". "Me too," he said, his brows furrowing in concern when he saw the tear. Could it be that she wanted there to be a them again? No, he couldn't get his hopes up. Just because she admitted to missing them, didn't mean that she meant that she wanted them to get back together. He couldn't misinterpret things. However, he wanted them to get back together in the worst way.

His smile widened as she congratulated him on the house, saying that she was happy for him, commenting that Goldens were favorite breed and that she hoped to meet Shadow some day.
"Oh definitely," he agreed. Should I tell her that I got the house and dog for us? he wondered. No, if he did that, he would come across as some sort of creepy stalker or trying to pressure her. And that was the last thing he wanted: to make her feel pressured. So yeah, he would go slow where she was concerned. If she wanted to get back together, he'd let it be on her terms. No matter how much it killed him. And it was killing him. He wanted her back in the worst way.

His brows then furrowed with some concern as she took a deep breath and stated that everyone would be glad to have him back, saying that Al hadn't been the same without him, that she was a poor substitute and that she didn't think he liked her very much, adding that she knew that Kevin missed him because he constantly talked about it and that he'd be happy to have him back as hanging out with her just wasn't the same.
"Well then Al's an idiot if he can't see what an amazing cop you are," he stated. What the hell? Al shouldn't be mistreating her, he thought to himself. Not that he'd ever say this to him because he knew that's not what she would want. But he would definitely be there for her...if she wanted him to be..

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Kim remained silent for a bit before she asked quietly, “Do you think, well I mean… would it ever be possible for there to be an us again? Or have I managed to mess everything up beyond repair?” She turned to stare out the passenger window and swiped at the tears escaping her eyes. This isn’t exactly how she had planned this conversation going, but it was too late to change things now. So much for taking things slowly Kim, just jump right on in there with the million dollar question. “I’m sorry, forget I asked you don’t have to answer that now… Just whenever you’re ready.”

By the time Adam had started to talk about his house and new dog she had mostly gathered her emotions, she was happy for him… really. Was it wrong that the thought of Adam moving on without her also depressed her a bit? The thought of meeting Shadow made her happier and she smiled at the thought. “Does Shadow have a favorite treat? I’ll be sure to bring it when I visit, have to make sure the dog likes me and all… a little bribery and bacon usually go a long ways with dogs.”

She watched as Adam looked concerned when she spoke about the others and laughed a bit when he called Al an idiot. “Not sure Al would appreciate being called an idiot, especially by you. He really thinks a lot of you Adam and I guess in a way he probably blamed me for you leaving… and he really wasn’t far off was he? He never really did or said anything that made me think he doubted my abilities, he just didn’t seem to be too happy to get stuck with me. Made for some really quiet car rides and stake outs, gave me a lot of time to think…”

She smiled sadly for a moment before letting out a laugh, “and poor Kev, he just missed his best friend. Made me kind of sad really, I used to think I was his best friend. I can’t blame him though, I missed you something terrible as well so I probably wasn’t much fun to be around. He tried to cheer me up though, so I give him credit for that.” Poor Kevin had tried, he’d asked her to go out with him several times. She’d gone a couple but soon realized that the nights out weren’t as much fun without Adam so she’d given up and started spending her nights at home alone. Making it through the work day took a lot of effort, so after work it had felt nice to go home alone where she didn’t have to pretend to be happy.

“So this undercover thing? I’m assuming it went well? Glad you want to come back with us though… Intelligence just wasn’t the same without you.”

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Adam's eyes flickered as Kim asked if he thought there was a chance of them being together again, hastening to apologize and telling him not to answer right away.
"i would love for us to get back together, but I would never put any pressure on you" he said, going to take her hands in his if she allowed it. And it was true. He loved her more than life itself and he wanted to get back together with her some day, but only if she was wanted that too, and then, at whatever pace she wanted. He'd take her in his life any way he could, even if it meant that he was permanently friend-zoned. After all, having her in his life just as a friend was way better than not having her in his life at all.

He smiled as she asked if Shadow had a favorite treat, saying that she'd remember to bring it the next time she was over, adding that a little bribery and bacon went a long way with dogs.
"He loves Beggin' Strips," he responded. Tell her that you bought him for the both of you, a part of him whispered. But what if she rejected him? No, she seemed to be receptive to getting back together.

He started to say something and then fell silent again as she stated that she wasn't sure Olinsky would appreciate him calling him an idiot, going on to say that he thought a lot of him and probably blamed her for him leaving in a way, adding that he wasn't too far off, assuring him that the man hadn't made any indication of doubting her abilities, just that he wasn't happy to be stuck with her, which led to a lot of quiet stakeouts and had given her some time to think.
"Oh? About what? I mean, if you don't mind me asking," he said. Yes, he was being a bit of a coward at the moment by not telling her how he felt, but he didn't want to jump the gun and end up scaring her away.

He then nodded as she went on to say that Kevin had missed him, saying that he was his best friend which had made her sad a bit as she had always figured she was his best friend, adding that she had missed him as well, and that he had tried to cheer her up.
"That's good. I'm glad he was there for you," he commented, trying to push down the stab of jealousy that had cropped up. They weren't together and she had every right to see someone else. Not that he knew for a fact that this was happening.

Her voice broke through his musings and he focused on her as she asked if the assignment had gone well, saying that she was glad that he was back and that Intelligence hadn't been the same without him.
"Yeah, it went good. Glad to be back though," He replied. "Missed everyone." Aw screw it, he thought to himself. Then, "Kim, the house, the dog...it's all for us."